Fill Each Other Then Pass Out Together

Slain in the spirit, #slaying in the flesh…
constellating this mess of stardust—
finessing it—into stellar text…
been a consummate #hermit of late—
working by lamplight—evading hazy

humid days—burning my midnight oil—
torching similar idioms—clichés—
turning over tarot—interpreting
cards’ portents—penning verse—composing worse
alternate versions—far more perverse

Universes—toiling on ordering
wor(l)ds…mind running in place, hiding in
pain, plain sight pale comparisons to
secrets I’ve tired of keeping, tried
keep together pieces which were leaving

before I even noticed things had
already ended, tempting redemption
fashioning satisfaction from scarlet
letters, working best into existence
better endings battered hearts yet still

embittered by just another’s passing
endeavour to weather together,
stitching with flame lies tied to tethers
unfettered lovers left tattered, and
never one to shy away from naming

the world, how my silenced desires worked,
perverted it, coerced this chaos to
coalesce with my chase and divert it,
powerful forces darker than my own
dim these efforts, cater to crisis

ever since, beside my Self, how denied
I was when, disillusioned, two of
us confusion’s mistrust touched, unless
we let dissolution rub off our
flush and, removing bruises, blemished this

want of both to blend into one wound
what ought not so mend so often or so
much, stammered suggestion until shattered,
fill each other then pass out together
now our own standard misadventure.